Book     Events     Fast Start Pack     Free Consultation     Keynote     Reviews/Blog     About/Contact Us     Home  

Blog Home | Check Out ALL Blog Posts |   

The "Wake Up" Call That Changed Everything

 

BlogPost-11112014About two or three times a week, someone asks if I had a defining moment that inspired me to create the Unlock The Game trust-based selling approach. And as it happens with most people who have a life-changing moment in their lives that put them on their true course, I did. For me, it was an epiphany, a realization, that created the momentum for Unlock The Game.

It was a painful yet eye-opening experience that I bet you can relate to quite well. This was the day my whole selling mindset changed forever. It happened about fifteen years ago when I was doing direct selling (after having spent several years studying all the great sales gurus, designing sales training for UPS, Qualcomm, and other major companies, and finishing my Masters degree in Instructional Design, which focuses on studying how people learn). On that fateful afternoon, I was on the phone doing an online demonstration with the top executives of a software company.

Have you ever had a sales call that felt like a “love fest”? This one was like that. Everything was going by the book. They were interested, they were asking me tons of questions, I had all the answers at my fingertips. At the end of the call, they thanked me profusely for my time. And the vice president’s final words were, “We’ll definitely be getting back to you.”

Pushing the Wrong Button (Or Maybe the Right One…)

I was so proud of how well things had gone that I could almost feel my head swell as I started to hang up the phone.

But then, instead of pushing the “off” button on the phone, I accidentally hit the “mute” button. I didn’t realize it until I heard them still talking. They hadn’t hung up, but they thought I had. And what do you think they were saying about our oh-so-promising phone conversation?

“Okay.” It was the vice-president’s voice. “So we’re definitely not going to go with him. But keep stringing him along. Get more information so we can get a better deal with another company.”

I was devastated.

My first feeling was outrage that they had lied to me. I felt hurt and used, but the feelings of rejection that swept over me were even worse. “I’m a good guy,” I told myself. “I did everything right. I’ve studied all the best sales programs in the world. I didn’t cut any corners. Why are they treating me this way?”

Then I remembered a lot of other times when I had gotten a gut feeling that something was “off” about how a prospect was reacting to me. I could never put my finger on it, but at some level I knew that everything I had learned was incomplete.

But until that “wakeup call,” I ignored that nagging discomfort and kept on doing what I had been doing.

Buyer-Seller Conflict: It Doesn’t Have to Exist

You know, a lot of sales programs today would look at that call and say: “If a prospect lies to you, it’s okay to lie back. If they’re aggressive to you, it’s okay to be aggressive back, because that’s how you can control the situation. If they try to box you in, it’s okay to force them into a commitment.”

But this buyer – seller conflict – the “battle,” or whatever you want to call it -- just felt so wrong. It took me a long time to figure out one basic truth that none of those “fight-back” sales programs ever talked about: the problem wasn’t with the prospect -- it was with me. There was something fundamentally wrong with how I was approaching selling. And I needed to change.

It was at this point that I was finally able to let go of the outrage and rejection and take responsibility for having tried to sell the “wrong” way.

Once I shifted my thinking from focusing on them to focusing on what I was doing, the answers started to come. I realized that the old ways of selling had everything backward. And that freed me to begin thinking about what ultimately became Unlock The Game.

They knew I had an agenda for that call, which was to make them buy what I had to sell. I tried to do it by going with my script, developing it, dealing with their “objections,” pushing subtly to move things forward...you know the drill. They seemed to be playing along, and I wouldn’t have known any differently if I hadn’t accidentally hit the “mute” button.

The Beginning of Unlock The Game®

So that’s really the day that Unlock The Game started to come into existence, although it took me several years to develop all the principles and ideas that are now in the Unlock The Game -- the Mindset and what it means, and how to express the Mindset principles in language and behavior that is gracious, low-key, respectful, and above all focused on the prospect rather than on the person selling.

To your success,

Aris Signature

2 Comments     Add Your Comments Here Email to a Friend

Miriam Byrne, Gibraltar
This is so true, brilliant article!!! I find so much truth in your articles, especially the last ones received in the last few months. Thanks.
Pete Ekstrom, New York
One of the smartest things I've seen you write. Salespeople and business people should take heed. You provided excellent words of wisdom, and a great perspective of the reality world we live in. Nice job...

Add Your Comments Here FaceBook Twitter LinkedIn Email to a Friend Print this Page Permalink





Over 78,598
Subscribers
Free Test Drive
Get 10 FREE Lessons
(Valued at $300)
AriFTDPic
(All fields must be completed to gain access)
 SECURE AND CONFIDENTIAL
Your information is 100% protected.

 

livechat-offline-ari2012
livechat-offline-bottom-left
livechat-offline-bottom-right
livechat-bottom-offline

aribookbanner

toby-book-banner-v1

Trusted Authority - US - Website Banner 2

privateconsultingbanner

SBFS Banner 02

 
connectwithari-top
connectwithus-facebook
connectwithus-youtube
connectwithus-twitter
connectwithus-linkedin
connectwithus-blog
ezine-chatwithusnow
connectwithus-bottom
 

richard-branson-v1

harlem-globetrotters-v4

joan-rivers-v3

iwins-v4

dallas-cowboy-cheerleaders-v2


BLOG • Latest Posts
Wise lessons I learned from Richard Branson....
by Ari Galper
This week I had the very fortunate opportunity to meet with Richard Branson. He's what I call the "b...
Having a tough day? An 11-year-old may inspire you...
by Ari Galper
During our recent Trusted Authority tour across Australia, I asked the audiences how long they have ...
My Predictions For 2015....
by Ari Galper
Hope you are well and are looking forward to a restful holidays. As things start to quiet down for u...
Diffuse Objections by Listening To Your Prospect’s Concerns...
by Ari Galper
You've probably heard this over and over in your career: "If you hear an objection, immediately over...
The "Wake Up" Call That Changed Everything
by Ari Galper
About two or three times a week, someone asks if I had a defining moment that inspired me to create ...
The Silent Zone: Lost Sale or Lost Truth?
by Ari Galper
If you've been in business for any length of time, you've probably experienced being dropped into th...
Can I save your marriage?
by Ari Galper
Something interesting happened to me last week that I thought I'd share with you. Last Monday here i...
Why is the truth so hard to tell...
by Ari Galper
Sometimes I ask myself: "Why aren't people comfortable with just telling the truth?" We live across ...
Who's the guru behind the guru...
by Ari Galper
My son Toby, who you probably know by now, is truly an inspiration. For the last six weeks, he's bee...
A life-changing message from my son Toby
by Ari Galper
Hope you are well and that the new year is turning out to be your best year ever. If it's not, this ...

Check Out ALL Blog Posts

Important Links 

 Free Test Drive

 Industry Success Stories

 About Ari

 Contact Us

Ari Speaking

 Speak with us now, live

 Read "Lessons From Toby"
  
 Order Toby's Book

March 28, 2017         Quote Of The Day

"Starting a call with your name and company makes it about you, not your prospect."

have-a-question2

Book | Events | Fast Start Pack | Free Consultation | Keynote | Reviews/Blog | About/Contact Us | Home

UTGM Footer - honesty online logo

© 2000 - 2014 Unlock The Game Pty Ltd ABN 39-001-118949. Unlock The Game is a registered trademark.
Legal Notices | Privacy Statement | Terms and Conditions | Shipping Policy | Resources | Sales Training | Cold Calling | Australia | Contact Us | Site Map